Drunk words are sober thoughts
by thecuddlyfork
Summary: Hiccup wakes up to another one of jack's bad pick up lines but gets a surprise when the drunk friend calls. Quick drabble with fluff UPDATE! This was supposed to be a drabble but now is a fic... i apologize
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: GUESSSS WHOS BACK!  
sorry for the short and... awful story but I thought i would write this as a warm up. It turned out cute and i like it!  
WARNING!  
Swearing, Drinking, Cute flustered Hiccup and Sexual Innuendos. **

Three In in the morning is an odd time to hear a theme song to your favorite childhood tv show. But not for Hiccup, he was rather used to hearing the kim possible theme song play at all times of the day .

The messy haired brunette could only groan and try to open his eyes as he prayed under his breath. "Pleaaasssee stop jack."  
But it would be no use considering The white haired male was laying in bed across town. He had been sending hiccup perfectly awful pickup lined all night, trying to annoy him. And was it ever working. Hiccup finally was able to peel open his sleep covered eyes and turn over to see his phone light up. "Metal note…. put phone on vibrate before bed." Hiccup grumbled.  
He picked up the cell phone and pressed the unlock button- a light more blinding than he had hoped assaulted his eyes, causing him to curse quickly. None of this was worth it, he was going to have some shitty pun that Jack had macgyvered in haste just to piss him off. Hiccup goes to his messages and scrolls through.

10:39-RECEIVED: FROM JACK  
Damn, if being sexy was a crime, you'd be guilty as charged!

10:39-SENT: TO JACK  
Please. no…

10:42- RECEIVED: FROM JACK  
Are you feeling tired Hiccup?

10:42- SENT: TO JACK  
Yes Jack, i'm trying sleep!

10:42- RECEIVED: FROM JACK  
No! Hiccup you ruined it! Just say: "no why?"

10:42- SENT: TO JACK  
Fine! No why?

10:43- RECEIVED: FROM JACK  
'cuz baby you been running through my mind all day!

10:46- RECEIVED: FROM JACK  
Hiccup?

10:47- RECEIVED: FROM JACK  
Do you have a map? Because i'm lost in your eyes.

10:47- RECEIVED: FROM JACK

10:55- RECEIVED: FROM JACK  
You turn my software into hardware!

11:15- RECEIVED: FROM JACK  
I hope there is a fireman in your room because you are SMOKIN'' HOT

11:30- RECEIVED: FROM JACK  
Excuse me! You dropped something…  
MY JAW!

11:31- SENT: TO JACK  
Sleep… please.

Hiccup scrolls faster, trying to find the closer ones.  
3:10-RECEIVED: FROM JACK  
Hhiccuuuop! If I had a ickle for every erfeson as f slexuy as you- i;d have five cents.7

3:10-RECEIVED: FROM JACK  
*nickle *person *as *sexy *i'd.

Hiccup tried to reread the text, he squints as he texts back.  
3:11-SENT TO JACK  
Jack are you drunk?

Hiccup waited for a response, worried. Caller id shows Jack's perfect white teeth as his ringtone blares. he quickly answers as to not wake his ebony cat toothless. "I'm intoxicated on y-*hic* you." Jack slurs. Hiccup flashes red and whispers, "Why are you drunk? Why did you call me? Why d-"  
"I wanted to hear your vvvoiicee! Hiccup, I love your voice!" Jack sounded extremely happy on the other end. There was clanging of bottles as he got up to walk around his room.  
Hiccup sighed and rolls his eyes, "Jack you're drunk go to bed." He couldn't think of a single reason why the other would call him as he was drunk.  
"No! Hiccup I need….. I need to tell you sommmthanggg." Jack began to laugh at his one little joke. Maybe it was the time, or the …. copious amounts of alcohol he had drunk but the "Somethang" made him chortle. Hiccup chuckles softly and smiles, "What is it you need to tell me?"  
"I love you man… Like. more than a bro. I love your damn green eyes- they…. they fucking sparkle when you smile." Jack says, holding himself up with a wall, losing his balance slightly. "God and your smile…. I just, *hic* always want to kiss your lips when you smile." Jack waits for a sound on the other end.  
"Hiccup?" He asks, voice cracking from the spill of emotion. "Are you asleep?"

Hiccup was not asleep. Not after hearing that. He was bright red and holding his freckled hand over his mouth, keeping any sound of breath silent. Gods… did he really just say that? And mean it? Hiccup chooses to stay quiet as Jack once again checks if Hiccup was asleep.  
"Hiccup?" He whispers and rubs his eye, sounding a bit sobered up.  
"I love you…. Goodnight." Jack hangs up, leaving the shocked Hiccup to ponder as the dial tone filled the room. Hiccup blushed and laid down, moving his phone to the table.


	2. Chapter 2

**OMG finally gained enough courage to post! Thank you to renkou for editing and adding a bit in, guys go read his stories they are amazing!  
****I apologize for the shorter chapter... I kinda wrote this while I was sick!  
Anyway, please have fun reading! There is a lot more NSWF in this so watch your back if reading in public. **

The sun shone into Jack's room. Somehow, 93,000,000 miles away, that sun of a bitch (pun intended) had not only perfect aim but a fucking sense of humor. The light landed perfectly on the hopelessly hungover Jack Frost, causing him to hiss – much like a cheesy hollywood vampire – and bolt under the covers to safety.  
The pounding headache gave him a bit of an idea on what happened last night. Poor Jack had gotten drunk, again, and probably jerked off to any piece of porn that looked remotely close to Hiccup.  
Jack looked at his legs under the covers. He still had his pants on and there was no lube near the bed, so that clearly didn't happen.  
So... What did he do?

Jack lifted his head, heart pounding a bit when he found his phone on the floor. He lifted it and saw that he was texting Hiccup all night. No surprise to him, who wouldn't want to text that cutie when they were off the chain drunk. He didn't blame himself until he saw a text from 3:45am.

3:45am RECEIVED- FROM HIC-BUTT  
I love you too.

It took seven times reading over the text before Jack could breath. It took just under 17 vows to never drink again before he picked up his phone to call Hiccup. It took only another second for Jack to once again lose his breath when he heard Hiccup's ringtone just outside his shitty (and empty-bottle-filled) studio apartment.  
You could hear hiccup flip open that archaic Samsung to answer, and his voice croaked. "Jack? I'm just outside your door."  
"Yeah... I can hear you..." he said in a husky morning voice. He bit his lip and began to feel his nerves take over.  
"May I come in?" God his voice sounded so sweet, so innocent like nothing had fucking happened last night. Jack dared not to speak, wishing he could just nod to avoid the pending voice crack he knew would happen if he opened his mouth.  
"S-suuure."  
Fuck. And there it was.  
Hiccup giggled softly, sounding like music to sooth Jack's headache. And then the door opened.

His smile fell when he saw how much Jack had drank; his hopes had all been crushed.

"Wow... that's a lot of... bottles." He said, looking around. "Do you remember anything from last night?" Hiccup asked, tilting his head to the side in question, causing his shaggy hair to fall over the shoulder. Jack shook his head, "I remember texting you... around 10 maybe... Everything else is a blur honestly."  
Hiccup nodded and looked at his feet. "You really don't remember what you said to me do you?" The mess of white hair suddenly felt guilt wash over him. "I-I read through my texts and saw yours. I... I must have said something really weird right?" He chuckled dryly to try and make it less awkward.  
Hiccup seemed very focused, ignoring what the other was saying. "So... you were really wasted last night huh?" he tried to laugh but it came out as more of a broken growl. He looked mad... very mad. He clenched his fists and kicked a bottle.  
Jack laughed nervously, "Look... what i said last night was... a mistake."  
Hiccup closed his eyes and mumbles under his breath, "Jack stop..."  
One knife through the heart.  
"I mean... If I said anything that made you think differently of me, just forget it. It was dumb of me really..." he smiled weakly, not hearing the sound of him slowly killing Hiccup.  
Two knives through the heart.  
"I mean- it's not like I'm some guy deeply in love with my best bro- that would be... So wrong. So if i said anything all lovey dovey... no homo dude."

Hiccup had lost count of the amount of knives that were stabbing what was left of his heart. He nodded sadly, looking down at his feet. He bent down and picked up a bottle. For a long, silent moment, he weighed it in his hand. Then, with a sudden anger, he launched it across the room. It shattered, spraying glass around the apartment.  
"Fuck you Jack!" he yelled, much to Jack's surprise. Hiccup's voice croaked as he began to tear up.  
Jack blinked, only now realising he could not take back a single word he said.  
Hiccup walked to the door, "Oh, and next time you drink, don't fucking dare to even think about me. You can fucking die for all I care." He spat out the words, and made a rather large scene as he quickly evacuated the room.  
Jack was left with a mess..  
Well two messes, but his room could wait. Jack stumbled out of bed and rushed after hiccup, wanting to explain everything but as he called out for the other on the stairs, he only got an eyeful of the sobbing hiccup trying to do up his seat belt and drive away as far as he could go.  
"Fucking hell Jack! Learn to keep your mouth shut!" he yells to himself and he grabs at his hair and walks to his room in shame.


	3. Chapter 3

**OMG I ACUALLY UPDATED?  
This was a sad...sad chapter so please, listen to music that makes you feel**

Hiccup left his phone on the side table this time. He watched as Jack bombarded him with texts, he lost count after the 45th "Hiccup please! Let me explain!" text.

Hiccup's eyes were red and nose stuffed up from the hours of tears rolling down his face. He had admitted to himself years ago that he did enjoy Jack's company, and in a bit less of a friendship way. He tried so hard to ignore the faint flirting Jack had showered him with since junior year of high school. He had always just told himself that jack was just being... well, Jack.

He assumed that to the other, it was nothing. But since they started university together 7 months ago, Jack had given off a more sincere mood each time he flirted. And Hiccup had stupidly gotten his hopes up.

Another text sent him over the edge, just what was Jack's game here? See how much he can draw out from the hopeless loser and then crush him down more? Hiccup felt salty warm tears fall down his cheeks again as Jack tried to call him for the ump-teenth time. He shook his head and finally got out of bed, walking out of his room. He let the phone go to voicemail again.

Hiccup opened the fridge, finding a six pack of beers. He shrugs and takes one out. As he tried the twist off, the cap sliced his hand. A stinging shallow cut appears, causing Hiccup to hiss and bring his hand up to suck off the blood. He curses and looks for a bottle opener, feeling more anxiety pool up as he frantically looks though the junk in all of the drawers. He feel himself crack just a bit more, he was so fucking useless he couldn't even find a fucking piece of metal that would let him open the bottle of beer that promised such sweet lies of temporary relief.

Hiccup was on the floor, clutching the now warming beer in one hand as he had yet another break down on the tiled floor of his kitchen. One hand held his sweaty forehead as his hitched, uneven breathing and broken, fatigued sobs filled the room. He covered his cut hand with his sleeve and twisted hard, the cotton polyester mix stung the cut and clung to the smeared sticky blood that stained his lightly tanned skin

God, no wonder Jack thought he could play with his feelings like this. He was this weak wimp that cried at almost everything. "Over sensitive clingy freak." He yelled to himself before he finally brought the beer bottle to his lips. He refused to take them off until he had chugged most of the alcohol out. He felt a little fuzzy, just not enough to dull his pain. He took the case out of the fridge and carried it off to his room.

Each hour that passed slowly went by in a drunken blur. Hiccup had gotten a lot accomplished by now, yelling in the mirror, breaking it as the sun set because he could see the shadows of his face prove how ugly he really was.

Hiccup was laying on his bed without the sheet, holding his laptop on his stomach as he scrolled through all of his photos on Facebook. He looked at all of the ones with him and Jack. God he looked so happy. "That doesn't last!" He yells at the screen, seeing some graduation day photos where he and Jack were smiling wide.

Hiccup had a headache now. His eyes hurt from the bright light radiating off of the screen he figured that it would probably ruin his corneas, but he could care less. He pushed the laptop away and stumbled into the bathroom where he kept his Advil. Hiccup had forgotten that he had drank a lot more than he should have, or maybe he subconsciously didn't care. Hiccup wanted his headache to go away so he could sleep. He tried hard to undo the childproof cap, but after about three minutes of a struggle he ended up in a teary mess.

And then Hiccup did something stupid, something he had been avoiding all night.

He called Jack.

Jack hadn't even let it ring before he answered his cell phone. "Hiccup!" He yells to the other end, "Let me explain! Please!"

Before Jack could start talking the voice on the other end mumbled  
"...I can't open it Jack.."

Jack lifted a brow, confused now. "W-what? What are you talking abou-"

"I Can't open the bottle JACK!" He yelled to the phone, crying again.

"What bottle? Hiccup what are you even? What?" Jack was getting his coat on and down the stairs to the ground floor. By the time he got to his car, the line on the other end went dead- the dial tone taunted Jack's ear.

Hiccup had hung up on him.

Jack got very worried now, it wasn't normal for Hiccup to call after 10pm, let alone sob on the other end about some mysterious bottle. He tried to unlock his 1991 Buick Century Sedan, but the key broke in the locks door. Jack's panic started to get the best of him, how was he supposed to get to hiccup now?

Maybe it was an adrenalin rush or maybe he was just an idiot, but Jack wasted no time.

He ditched his broken keys, his shitty sedan and ran to Hiccup's apartment. He ran the 15 minute drive in 10 minutes, getting to impossible speeds to reach his friend's place. Jack would have broken down the door if it wasn't for the fact he was heaving from the "energizing" run over. He jiggled the knob but Hiccup had it locked. "Damn it!" he swore as he checked under the mat for the extra key. Lucky for him it waited there.

Jack walked quickly inside to see a shit storm of a mess and one light on down the small hallway. He rushed over to see a crying Hiccup still clinging desperately to his phone, that had shut off from a dead battery, begging for Jack to come and open the Advil bottle for him.

Jack slumped down to the floor and fought Hiccup for the bottle. Hiccup gave up quickly and covered his face while he cried. "I have a headache... I just want to sleep.." He explained. Jack frowned and wrapped his arms around him, only to get a swift slap to the face. "Don't touch me you flirting fiend!" Hiccup barked drunkenly. "I don't want to hurt more!" He slurred.

Hiccup looked a lot like a child when he cried. Snot bubble in his nose, tears covering his face, mouth opened while he tried to speak between hard breaths. Jack felt a lot of guilt, piecing together quickly without any explanation from, the other. He figured that Hiccup had liked him back a lot, maybe more then Jack liked him.

Another 30 minutes passed of Hiccup crying with his knees pulled up to shelter his face. Jack had finally gotten a chance to hold him close. He swallowed shallowly and whispered. "I...I love you and I said the wrong thing." He admits.

When he wasn't interrupted by Hiccup, Jack continued. "I... I honestly love you- a lot more than might be healthy... I get drunk every Friday night and whack off- think!- think about loving you. I wanted nothing more than to... have you all to myself. But I was scared that... that you wouldn't want me because- god because look at you! You're so perfect! So smart, and handsome. Every one of your freckles distract me, god, I would count them if you let me. I just want to love you like you need...so...Hiccup?" Jack asked, tearing a bit. "Hiccup come on, say something please." He looked down in his arms.

Hiccup was curled up to Jack's chest, sleeping soundly. His breathing was slow but even paced, and his tears had stopped. Hiccup fell asleep feeling safe right where he was.

**Jack on the other hand, felt a bit cheated by fate. He finally had what he wanted but, Hiccup hadn't heard a single word of what he said. Half of his brain told him to leave to find paper and write what he said down before he forgot. The other half told him to stay where he was and enjoy the moment.**

So Jack fell asleep with Hiccup on the bathroom floor, feeling that he should get a good sleep before he tried to repeat everything to the hiccup. Something told him that tomorrow morning was going to be very emotional. 


End file.
